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Debra Irene

Sticky Fingers

November 10, 2011 By Debra Irene 2 Comments

10 Nov

I don’t like being the victim of a thief.  It takes me a little time to work through my emotions and eventually reach forgiveness – even when we don’t know whom to forgive – thus one of the reasons there is a chapter entitled “The Thief” in Reflections.  Writing “The Thief” brought me to a place where I could finally find peace with the incident.  I suppose stealing is the end result of coveting what another person has, deceitfully taking with the intent of never returning.  Why would a human being violate another in this way, especially someone close to you? 

Another incident:  I had a very special pair of earrings stolen my senior year in high school.  They were a Christmas gift from a friend who was later killed in a car wreck just a few weeks before graduation.  The week of the funeral, I had very good reason to believe a friend and fellow classmate took them.  Although I was never able to prove it, I learned other friends had witnessed her stealing and had overlooked it.  I was appalled and instead exposed her.  I moved away shortly after graduation and eventually the sting diminished.  At our ten-year reunion, I could tell she was uncomfortable; and before leaving town, I confronted her again – not to condemn but to forgive.  I needed to do that, and she hugged me.   Years later, my sister found a pair of similar earrings and bought them for me for my birthday – what a sensitive and thoughtful thing to do.  Each time that I wear them, I remember the one who gave the original gift who is no longer with us, the one I forgave, and the one who replaced them.  Memories – precious memories all around.

I have yet to experience any precious memories from the theft described in my book Reflections, but I still had to come to terms with the betrayal and forgive – forgive the unknown transgressor.  This was difficult, and I didn’t really know how to do it.  But somehow writing that chapter released me to forgive.

More recently, I’ve even found a little humor when I was violated in a similar way again.  Perhaps I’m just getting old and more accustom to people’s shortcomings, understanding that I, too, stumble and fall.  I was at a conference exhibiting Reflections.  On my table, I displayed a couple copies of the book, business cards, bookmarks, and other PR material.  On one end of the table, I displayed what I had donated in a gift sack as a door prize: an autographed hardbound copy of Reflections, a jar of my famous family-recipe apple butter, and a candle labeled “Reflections.”  We were told the room would be locked overnight and it would be okay to leave everything set up.  The next morning, I was getting settled in at my table and noticed the candle was not there.  Immediately I checked the boxes behind the table to make sure my stock of books hadn’t grown legs.  Oddly, nothing was missing but the candle – an inexpensive candle I purchased simply because of the name.  I had to laugh.  I turned to the exhibitor next to me and said:  “I think I should be offended.  Someone took my candle but left my pearls, my precious cargo – the books and the apple butter.  Must not have been pearls to them.”  🙂  Oh well – what more can I say?

“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”  Matthew 6:14  (NIV)

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Comments

  1. Myrna says

    November 16, 2011 at 12:26 am

    Debbie,
    Who was the friend that died before graduation? Was she/he from Bolivar? I can’t remember someone dying that I knew, so I am worried that I am losing my memory!!! 🙂
    I enjoy reading your blogs, and I truly loved your book. I am so proud of you and for you!!!
    Love, Myrna

    Reply
    • Debra Irene says

      November 16, 2011 at 12:57 am

      Thank you, Myrna, for your comments. No, the person was not from Bolivar. Cheryl moved away our freshman year. She and I remained very close and I would visit her in the summers. Her boyfriend gave me the earrings for Christmas our senior year when I was visiting her over the holidays. He was killed in a car crash then in May … very sad. Cheryl is remembered in my chapter “Cheryl and Jan” in my book “Reflections” – we lost her too soon as well. You are one of my treasures. Thank you for being my friend all these years.

      Reply

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